It's All So West Indian

Thu, Jul 8, '04

 

musings with PERCY PATSON

Percy Patson here chaps. Listening to good old Viv Richards having a pop at all and sundry on TV, it's ever so funny hearing him speak in that West Indian brand of English he dispenses.

Viv tells the tale in a way of a friend of yours who you don't want around when the better-offs are visiting. Doesn't mean the tale isn't true though, but what does that mean to those who worship Marlon Samuels for the way he wears his earrings. Style is substance lads, and don't you forget it.

I heard it was quite a story about conflicts and interests. In the Caribbean you see, Lara is allowed to have free reign to criticise Viv in the newspaper. The same Lara that is a paid employee. But, Viv, an unpaid committee member, can't. So very West Indian, eh?

What about those WICB directors and their wonderful range of business interests which are being fattened up with every progressive deal from Digicel to the World Cup.

Something stinks here chaps and it doesn?t bode well for the security of the game in the West Indies if you ask me. But, then, what do I know? I am just a West Indian in Wales.

The newest West Indian cricket hero is Ramnarine. Didn't see much of him over here. He does fake a good cramp though, which is incidentally the last time I saw him anywhere. Laid out on a field, spray-painting his shoes and crying blue murder.

However, from what I hear, Ramnarine has developed into quite a genuine champion of player causes. Funny isn't it? They often tell you that you can tell a person's measure by the way they behave in adversity. I guess to go from cramps to player advocacy is a natural progression.

Apparently Sir Viv (bless him), was a bit of a brute to the poor players. My workmates always told me he was a crude boor of a man. Of course, the fact that they did that in the midst of blackwashes didn't exactly have it ringing in my ears.

Word back from the dressing room was that Viv told Merv Dillon that he was a prat and that he'd never play for the Windies again. Should have told Merv about getting some dental work as well, but satire isn't one of Viv's strengths. Anyway, I don't know which is a bigger blow to West Indies cricket; Viv telling Dillon he'll never play again, or Lara telling Dennis Waithe to take a hike.

It's a real tough one, eh?

So player revolution has indeed come to the fore. Shame on Viv for shouting at these players. Player abuse should not be tolerated, especially when loud shouting can damage already fragile physiques. All they need is rest and love. Well, they can be guaranteed plenty of love as they tour England. Love will be pouring through the windows and doors late at night.

Ramnarine is touted as a future WICB president. He has impressive credentials from what I can see. All he needs are a couple more bank accounts in different countries, a predilection for gin and tonic and an aversion to auditing, and voila, we have the perfect candidate.

Anyway, it's good to see West Indies back on track. I'm originally from the West Indies but I am a bit torn. Bit like my friend from Albania who wants his football team to beat England but doesn't crow it too much in case someone starts talk about immigration papers. Not very wise when you only came for six months -- 20 years ago.

If you stay around this West Indies team long enough, you'll see everything. I myself have seen the development of the Chanderpaul signature. It has taken eight years but I may indeed get that proper autograph I crave. It's a bit like Viv's vocab. You have to look elsewhere for the real value chappies.

It's all so very West Indian.